Joe le taxi

There are some differences between cabbies in London and Brighton and not just that most journeys are £20 cheaper. In London, you suspect that the driver will take his time and take the longest route possible while extolling his opinions on just what’s wrong with the world. Head almost permanently set looking over his shoulder, barely observing the road. In Brighton, they try and take the quickest route and get rid of you as fast as possible, trying not to fall into yet another of the same cab conversations.

A typical Brighton cab journey normally involves one of the following questions, as the passenger, rather than the driver, initiates conversation.

“Busy night?”

“Traffic’s bad tonight.”

“Christ, there’s some fuckwits out tonight.”

“How long until you finish?”

Getting into the cab tonight was a slightly different experience. As I opened the door and sat in the back seat, the driver put down the book he was reading. I told him my address and we set off. Seeing my opportunity to avoid the typical clichés, I took it.

“So what are you reading?” I asked?

“Oh, ‘The Firm.’”, he replied.

“Can’t say I’ve read it. Oh, hold on, that’s John Grisham isn’t it?”

At that point he choose to pick the book up and examine the front cover, obviously while still driving through the busy Brighton night traffic, which was just a little disconcerting.

“Yeah, it is. Saw the film years ago and thought I’d give the book a chance.”

“Do you get to read a lot while waiting for fares then? What else have you read recently?”

“Yeah, on the quiet nights. Plus I read at home. The Mrs hates it as she thinks I'm ignoring her. I had some book from the Reader’s Digest the other day. Four books in one type thing. They had an Andy McNab one and another action type story too.”

Given that this was a thick set man, shaven headed and possibly wearing an England shirt, I could understand how the likes of McNab would appeal. He did strike me as more Sun reader than book reader.

“My favourite though”, he continued, “was the third one. It was a romantic story set in Australia. I swear, I could feel the sun beating down on me as I read it. It was a bit Jackie Collins but I loved it. It was beautiful. By the way, you’re the only person I’ve admitted this to. If the lads ever heard about this I’d never live it down.”

I gave him a large tip and left the cab smiling.

I just hope the lads don’t read this.